I woke up early this morning...Five fricken thirty in the morning. I had to drive my husband to work. When I got home the worst thing happened to me. I couldn't go back to sleep. You wanna know WHY? Cuz I kept thinking to myself, as I lay in bed, 'go to sleep.'And I couldn't! I didn't sleep very much last night because I kept telling myself the same dang thing! GO TO SLEEP! Besides downing a bottle of nyquil, I tried everything! I played some music in my head, switched positions a million times, got on the couch to get comfortable. Now, as I sit here at work, I gotta keep telling myself WAKE UP! So I figure I have two options-- go to bed a lot earlier and hopefully I'll get bored enough to go to sleep, or take up drinking coffee...I bought a pound of folger's this morning...just kidding.
I'm cursed...I am 99% sure of it. Have you ever gone out to dinner with a group of friends or just on a date and somehow YOU are the one who ALWAYS ends up with the stray hair in your food??? This has happened to me...consecutively for the past-- you know I lost track of how many times it's happened to me. But frankly, I don't know that I can eat out anymore. What the freak happened? Shouldn't people be wearing hats or hair nets or something?Or how about full on body suits?! I swear, every restaurant chain has sent out a memo that says, "Psssttt, put a hair in 'this' girl's food." When you find a hair in your food, shouldn't you get your meal free? Well, I definitely think so but you know what I say? Don't do it...take the money...take the money and walk away because you know you're not gonna want to eat the dang food! Cuz now you're paranoid! What if something else falls in your food?! HUH? What are you THINKING! You're CURSED! If you're always gettin the stray hairs in your food, poison is not far off...
Have you ever heard that the game of Rock, Paper, Scissors can solve most of your problems when you and your significant other are fighting over who has to do what chore? Yeah well, not true...because we're both just too lazy to even play the game to solve our problems. For the last four nights me and my husband have been sleeping on our blow-up air mattress in our living room. Our clean clothes have taken over our usual quarters and neither of us is stepping up to reclaim our space...I don't know how long this will drag out-- all of the fart noises being made whenever someone shifts into a different position is keeping me awake. But, I think I've found a solution! I plan on moving the clothes to just my husband's side of the bed tonight...he's sure to put them away.
I've decided to start a new quest. It seems that I am forced to put my attempts of ridding the world of garden gnomes on hold. I fear my new mission however will be futile--attempting to silence the stupid, stupid question kid who occupies a seat in my science class. Today, more than ever, I wished I could shove his face closer to the mixture of hydrogen and ammonium chloride that my professor mixed in a Petri dish.
"Don't inhale that!" Dr. Stephens yelled as he pushed stupid, stupid question kid back into his seat.
"Why aren't you supposed to mix hydrogen and ammonium chloride?" asks stupid, stupid question kid.
That's when I felt my hand silently creep towards the back of his neck. I caught myself just before my hand reached the top of his chair.
Why don't you inhale and SEE why we don't mix the two together you oblivious moron!
Fortunately, I didn't think this out loud... unlike the last class period I experienced with him. I'm positive that my malice towards his stupid, stupid questions is quite apparent. I don't hide the fact that I despise his presence. Especially when I am particularly interested in a topic being discussed by the Doctor and stupid, stupid question kid interrupts...
"Force equals mass times acceleration." says Dr. Stephens.
Stupid, stupid question kid doesn't bother waiting to be called on before the words escape his mouth, "So what you're saying is, FORCE equals MASS times ACCELERATION?"
Son of a freaking hairy goat! Where is this idiot from?! Is this class supposed to be my own personal hell?! He keeps tacking on the words, "So what you're saying is..." to the very beginning of the professor's statement!
I am still in my science class and there is but an hour to go...I'm not sure that I'll survive the dense air of stupidity that is creeping towards me from across the aisle. The professor has just brought out a bucket of liquid nitrogen and stupid, stupid question kid is dangerously close to the demo...perhaps the force of gravity will for once be on my side and pull his dumb head into the bucket...If this doesn't happen, I'd gladly settle for him to experience an illness that would keep him from attending class for the next few weeks...
"Don't inhale that!" Dr. Stephens yelled as he pushed stupid, stupid question kid back into his seat.
"Why aren't you supposed to mix hydrogen and ammonium chloride?" asks stupid, stupid question kid.
That's when I felt my hand silently creep towards the back of his neck. I caught myself just before my hand reached the top of his chair.
Why don't you inhale and SEE why we don't mix the two together you oblivious moron!
Fortunately, I didn't think this out loud... unlike the last class period I experienced with him. I'm positive that my malice towards his stupid, stupid questions is quite apparent. I don't hide the fact that I despise his presence. Especially when I am particularly interested in a topic being discussed by the Doctor and stupid, stupid question kid interrupts...
"Force equals mass times acceleration." says Dr. Stephens.
Stupid, stupid question kid doesn't bother waiting to be called on before the words escape his mouth, "So what you're saying is, FORCE equals MASS times ACCELERATION?"
Son of a freaking hairy goat! Where is this idiot from?! Is this class supposed to be my own personal hell?! He keeps tacking on the words, "So what you're saying is..." to the very beginning of the professor's statement!
I am still in my science class and there is but an hour to go...I'm not sure that I'll survive the dense air of stupidity that is creeping towards me from across the aisle. The professor has just brought out a bucket of liquid nitrogen and stupid, stupid question kid is dangerously close to the demo...perhaps the force of gravity will for once be on my side and pull his dumb head into the bucket...If this doesn't happen, I'd gladly settle for him to experience an illness that would keep him from attending class for the next few weeks...
So today I'd say is pretty frustrating for me...I've been attempting to download a new page layout for my blog and have failed consecutively. I wish I had a blog guru to walk me through it. Today it's raining! I definitely think that it's going to help me write some more of my stories. *fingers cross.
